I feel very alone.

I feel very alone. I just got out of a long-term relationship and I know it was for the best and that he wasn't someone I should spend my life with, but it still hurts. It hurts because I thought I was going to spend my life with him. It hurts because I thought he was committed and that he deeply loved me in the same way I loved him. It hurts because he got caught up in another girl and couldn't even decide what to do. It hurts because he wasn't mature enough to handle who I've grown to be and who I'm becoming, and it hurts because I was blindsided by it all. It hurts because I thought he had integrity and character and instead I find out that the person I've loved for so many years isn't who I thought he was.

Dear Hazel, Hudson, Sage and my niece or nephew that my sister is still growing right now. (Hurry up, January!),

Tuesday is a giant day for our country. It is going to make history. You are going to learn about this some day in school. There are actually a ton of things going on right now that you are going to learn about in school. That being said, there are some things that I want to say now while I am feeling them. There are things I want you to know, things you need to know

Sometimes I Worry I Am Becoming The Person I Promised Myself I'd Never Be.

It was easier, throughout high school and most of college, to assume I'd always be the single one, going it alone. It didn't bother me much; I packed my schedule and was always studying, always the headstrong one who didn't have time to let another person in let alone risking loving or depending on them. The anxiety that has crippled so many in my family also contributed, perhaps, to wanting to isolate myself a bit; because I knew that if and when that side of me ever creeped out, it'd get ugly quickly.

Today has been, in a nutshell, chaotic and horrible. I hit my breaking point.

Today has been, in a nutshell, chaotic and horrible. I hit my breaking point. I couldn’t get a grip. I was breaking out in hives. I was crying in the break room during my lunch and I was telling myself that I am a failure. Then, I text one of my favorite friends, Hannah, who has been in my corner since we have met and she said to me, “Write about it, post it, and inspire someone who thinks they’re the only one feeling not good enough.”

I'm not even 22, and yet already I've been through a lot. I never really imagined growing up would be like this, but it is.

I'm not even 22, and yet already I've been through a lot. I never really imagined growing up would be like this, but it is.

Throughout elementary school, I was bullied, beaten up, and I grew terrified of school, but still enjoyed learning.

At 14, I was assaulted by a boy I thought I could trust, with the help of my first ever real boyfriend.

10 years ago, I was married to a wonderful man; generous, kind, financially stable.

10 years ago, I was married to a wonderful man; generous, kind, financially stable. On paper, it seemed like I had it all. To the rest of the world, I did. There was only one problem, I wasn't happy. I was an empty vessel, lonely, bored longing for something that was missing. It was just around that same time that I met someone else. Oddly enough, someone else who was going through the same things in their life that I was in mine. We became friends. I liked having this person in my life who understood me and understood how I felt. But that's where things got complicated. We both quickly realized that the thing missing in each of our lives--was each other. I loved him. He loved me. But this was far from the perfect love story. We had to end our marriages and start a new life. Start all over again.

My dad is the most inspirational person that I have ever been lucky enough I know.

My dad is the most inspirational person that I have ever been lucky enough I know. He is hilarious. He is so wise and kind and weird. He cares more about his lawn than most and he loves The Eagles. He is spiritual and open-minded. He lives every day of his life for others and has shown me what is important-- what real success is-- and that the important things in life really aren’t things. He is pure good.