I have been bullied all my life.

 Listen Lucy,

I have been bullied all my life. Through elementary school, I was called fat and ugly. And even through middle school, I've been called worse than that. I was sitting in reading, and the kid behind me said, "At least it's better than being a guy like her," and he pointed at me. 
Some days I'll come to

school crying because at home things aren't good either. I'm everyone's punching bag. I wouldn't say I'm abused, but I'm close to. I'm only 14 and I've already thought about suicide and cutting and hurting myself. I'm worried about myself or what to do.