I've always been a confident person...
I’ve always been a confident person. Anyone who knows me knows that I over prepare for everything that I do, that I am an extremely hard worker. Because I am always over prepared I rarely ever get nervous or scared, but what happens when I face a situation that I am not prepared for?
The other night I was lying in bed unable to sleep. I’m almost done with my junior year of college, which means I am going to be in the real world soon. I’m going to be teaching America’s youth in less than two years. That’s when I realized I have no f***ing clue what I am doing. Are you kidding me? I’m going to be 22 years old and responsible for the growth and development of so many young students? I started sweating and for the first time in a long time I doubted myself.
I think one of my main problems is that I always expect perfection out of myself. This isn’t a bad thing, it’s actually a great thing. It’s made me who I am today. I’ve never been the type of person who just gets things right away; I’ve always envied those people though. My imperfections have driven me to work harder, over prepare, and physically/mentally will myself to success.
Just like everything else, I expect to be the perfect teacher when I walk into my first classroom. Guess what my man? That’s impossible!!! I realized why I feel like I have no idea what I am doing. It’s because I don’t! But that’s more than okay, because that doesn’t mean that I’m not going to be a good teacher. In fact, I think I’m going to be an amazing teacher. I just have to take it slow, and realize that I can only learn from experience, not from some text book.
I guess that’s my message that I want to share with everyone. Don’t be nervous or scared about something in your life because you don’t know what you’re doing. No one knows what they are doing until they go out there and do it. You are going to fail, you should! Don’t let it deter you from your dreams or shake your confidence. Rather let it motivate you and learn from it. I read something on this site once that I have since always tried to keep in mind, “Slow down, get in the right hand lane and go the speed limit.” I’m not going to be the best teacher in the world the first day I walk in. Is that still my goal? Of course. Will I fail? Without a doubt. But it’s not about doing it right the first time, only on the rarest of occasions does that occur. It’s about having the courage to change the world, the charisma to captivate people’s minds, the strength to keep going even when you fail. Slow down and go the speed limit. Don’t be scared, be confident in yourself. Don’t worry about the results right away, worry about the process itself. If you do that you don’t have any reason not to be confident."